


Cat Tendencies: Kitty Kisses

by bitnari



Category: HEARTBEAT (Video Game)
Genre: Banter, Crack, Eve Staccato - Freeform, F/F, Fluff, Klein Gremory - Freeform, Scientific
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2019-06-21
Packaged: 2020-05-15 20:24:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19303183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bitnari/pseuds/bitnari
Summary: In which Eve attempts to run a very scientific™ study on Klein. And in which I apply my psychology major to something actually worthwhile: fluffy fanfiction. Also Klein is in human form. Incredibly awkward to be in cat form. You’ll see why.





	Cat Tendencies: Kitty Kisses

**Author's Note:**

> I'm posting this since I've seen people ask for it. Originally a Secret Valentine's gift for NNChan! Written in the midst of writing many college papers... This idea came to me in a flash of light and a blur of motion.

_In this paper, I will address a curiosity that I’ve had ever since I’ve met my contracted Cat Sith partner, Klein Gremory. Being of the Cat Sith species, Klein may exhibit certain traits that are reminiscent of the common house cat, such as purring, playing with yarn, and other notable behavior._

_This paper will use scientific methods to attempt to answer these two questions._

**_The Broad Question:_ ** _Does Klein exhibit cat tendencies?_

 **_The Specific Question:_ ** _When exposed to certain stimuli, will Klein exhibit cat tendencies?_

……

**Study 1: Exposure to Yarn**

_Past observations have confirmed that house cats have an unbearable urge to play with balls of yarn, acting as if the yarn itself tangles around them, constricting and binding like a net. In this study, we will attempt to test if past results with house cats will generalize to the common Cat Sith. We hypothesize that prior research will generalize to our subject, Klein Gremory._

_The subject will be exposed to a ball of yarn acquired from the local supermarket. We will record data through the use of discrete visual observation..._

Eve put down her notepad and wondered if it was worth it to record everything so officially. She shrugged and put down her pen. _Alright, here goes._

While hiding behind a wall, she rolled the ball of yarn into Klein’s field of vision, allowing just a little bit of yarn to trail behind it. She hoped that the trailing string would entice Klein enough for her to pounce. Holding a video camera in her hand, she hit record, hoping to get whatever happened on tape.

……

Klein was, as usual, polishing her rapier. Nothing could be more satisfying than seeing the stains on her blade slide right off. Brandishing her blade and inspecting the new shine, she smiled, _nothing could ruin this moment._

Out of the corner of her eye, she caught sight of what looked like a ball of yarn cross her field of vision. She wondered how it got there and figured that Eve must have dropped it while doing some errands, but why such a peculiar object? She never realized that her Conjurer did any sort of knitting.

She set down her rapier and walked towards the yarn. She nonchalantly picked it up and looked around the corner of the wall to find her Conjurer with a camera and a priceless semi-horrified look on her face. She looked like she was about to run away.

“Eve… what are you doing.”

She ran away.

* * *

 

**Study 2: Cucumbers**

_Alright, this one had to work._

Eve saw [ some online videos of cats getting scared by cucumbers ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXv44YL_Gio) and wanted to see if Klein reacted in the same way. She snickered to herself as she heard a knocking on the bedroom door. It was surely Klein, coming in to remind Eve about some task that they were supposed to do an hour or so ago. _Everything was going according to plan. She couldn’t let this opportunity pass._ She took the cucumber in hand and placed it in a corner where Klein would notice only after she enters the room. She smiled.

“Come in!"

“Eve, I know that you have a significant amount of schoolwork, but you have to realize that your responsibilities as a Conjurer must come before any oth--” She paused as she saw the cucumber. “ _E-EVE! BE CAREFUL THERE’S A-- A SNAK--_ ” Klein screamed as she grabbed Eve and jumped toward the “safety” that was her bed. Laying under Klein’s weight, Eve began to laugh. _The experiment was a success._

She could feel Klein shuddering from fear while she was still grabbing onto her. For some reason she felt a blush coming to her cheeks. They’ve barely ever had physical contact with each other, let alone being semi-pinned down in her own bed.

“K--Klein calm down! It’s just a cucumber.” She pat her on the back to comfort her. Klein let go and slowly turned to look back at the “snake.” Not thinking much about the compromising position that she was in, Klein shot a glare at Eve through narrowed eyes. “What?”

Eve stopped laughing, now looking at Klein with something between fear and.. Well. No she was pretty scared, maybe a little embarrassed. The blush on her cheeks became redder, and she turned away.

“What was this for?”

“Nothing!”

“Why are you getting so red?”

“It’s… It’s really nothing!”

“Do you.. have a fever?”

“No!”

Klein’s expression softened as a red came to her cheeks, “O--oh.. I see what it is now.” She let go of Eve and left the bed to pick up the cucumber, giving it a suspicious look before setting it on a desk. An awkward silence ensued.

“What was this about?”

“I..”

“Yes?”

“I wanted..”

“Mhm.”

“I wanted you…”

“What?”

“N--NO! NO. NOT.”

Eve was waving her hands in the air, trying desperately to find a way to undo her mistake.

“Cat got your tongue?”

“I wanted _to. TO. I wanted TO.”_

“You wanted to do?”

She was flailing now.

“NO. I WANTED TO DO..”

“You’re really not helping your case here.”

Eve sat up, looking at Klein. Nothing seemed to faze her, but Eve could see a small crack in Klein’s armor. Despite her nonchalant expression and cool tone, there was a soft pink on her cheeks.

“I...I wanted to do... an experiment.”

“An.. experiment? Of what sort?”

She looked away, trying to not look at Klein while she said her next words.

“W-well, I was trying to see if you acted like a cat.”

“You what?” Klein burst into laughter. “Eve, I’m a Cat Sith. Did you really think that a Mog like me would ever stoop to the level of a mere house cat?”

“Yes????”

After a long moment of continued laughter, Klein coughed and composed herself once more, straightening her back and adjusting her cape. She smirked, “Well, there is _one_ thing that we Cat Sith do that may resemble what cats here in the Outset might do.”

“W-what is it?’

“It’s a secret. I wouldn’t tell you even if you opened a can of _wet food_ for me!”

“H-hey! I never said--”

“Oh, but you _implied--”_

“I didn’t _i-imply_ anything, all I did was put that cucumber there to scare you like those online videos, and then you got scared, and then you PinnedMeToMyOwnBed.” Eve covered her own mouth.

“Oh, is that what this is about now?”

Eve moved her hand away for a moment, opening her mouth and hoping that the right words would come out of her lips, but nothing came. By this point her whole face was a tomato, a steaming tomato. As cool as ever, Klein walked closer towards her, sitting in front of her and making eye-contact, “I have something to say.

Eve swallowed as she continued to avoid eye-contact with Klein. She wanted to shrink away into nothing. Nothing could save her from this situation. This incredibly awkward and silent situation.

 “I--I can expl-”

“Shhhh. Don’t talk. You’ll just keep saying the wrong things.”

Klein waited until Eve was able to settle down before taking a moment and to blink slowly at her. It was a drawn out process, eyelids going down and then back up. She repeated the motion three times. Eve looked at her with a confused expression.

“Are you settled down now?”

“Y--sure.”

“Then we’ve got Mogs to beat. Get out of bed.”

Klein got up and walked out of the door. “I’ll be waiting outside. _Come out when you’re ready_.” She let the last sentence trail off with an off-character sing-song tone. The door closes, and Eve covered her face with a pillow to scream.

The door opened slightly to cut her off, and Eve felt her heart beating faster. _No. Not this again. Please leave._ She peeked out of the cover of her pillow to see Klein’s hand reach from the door to the cucumber on Eve’s desk.

“I’m putting this back in the kitchen unless you need it for more… _experiments._ ”

Eve let out something like a gurgle before hiding under her pillow once more, “ _God_ I want to die.”

“The only thing dying is your aptitude for flirting if that’s all you’ve got.”

“WHAT?”

“Oh it’s nothing. Don’t spend _too long_ laying in bed. You’ve got things to _do_!” The door shuts.

 

* * *

 

**Results and Implications:**

It was night, and after a long day of running errands and saving townspeople, Eve finally let herself fall into her bed. She took out her phone, opening the lock screen to access a search engine. She typed _“cats blinking”_ into the search bar. Something about that experience stuck with her, and she had a hunch that something was up.

The search brought up a blog page dedicated to “everything cat”. She skimmed through the page until she found what she wanted to know. She read through it once and then read it again, a blush rising up to her cheeks. She read it a third time just to make sure she was reading it right.

“WHAT?!?”

**_“Slowly blinking at you is a sign of pure love, and it’s often even referred to as a ‘kitty kiss.'”_ **

**_“Next time, try blinking back!”_ **

 

* * *

 

**HYPOTHESIS PROVEN.**

_Data shows that Cat Siths continue to exhibit certain traits of the common house cat. From these results, we conclude that we reject the null hypothesis. Notable behaviors include but are not limited to: “kitty kisses.”_


End file.
